I don’t usually make New Years resolutions but I have decided that 2006 was so bad for my family (not nearly as bad as it was for a lot of people) that I would give it a shot.
My son when we were wishing each other a happy new year summed it up pretty well when he described our 2006 as a train wreck.

I resolve to quit my job and turn to a life of crime. Jewel thief sounds like a lot of fun.

I resolve to forsake all my friends and relatives and stop reading and writing blogs.

I resolve to quit taking my pills and start smoking again, eat more fried food and sugar, and coat everything in salt.

I resolve to turn down any help or advice offered and to go out of my way to piss off perfect strangers, though I have never met anyone who is perfect in my life.

I further resolve to make a special effort to gain at least 100 pounds and stop doing anything that could be considered as personnel hygiene.

I resolve to also send money in response to all Email requests from Nigeria or British Columbia.

I resolve to go out to some Hacker sites I know about and insult everyone there being sure to give them as much information about me and daring them to do anything about it.

I also resolve to quit playing World of Warcraft and do other things to isolate myself from my kids and grandkids.

Oh, by the way I have never managed to keep a single New Years resolution and figure I’m not going to change at 50.

Happy New Year!!!